Hero Worship
by Riviyan Questa
Summary: The rise and fall of a Manchester rock band. Rated for sexual themes, language, and drug use.
1. Chapter One: Gigantic

Title: Hero Worship  
Author: Shea Pierce  
Rating: R  
Fandom: Lost  
Disclaimer: Not mine, mostly. Liam, Charlie, Patrick, and Sinjin belong to people not me. I wish they did though. Julianne, Catherine, Terry, and anyone you don't recognize belong to me. I stole the title from an episode of Star Trek.

And this I know 

His teeth as white as snow 

What a gas it was to see him 

Walk her every day 

Into a shady place 

With her lips she said 

She said 

Hey Paul, Hey Paul, Hey Paul, let's have a ball 

_"Gigantic" The Pixies_

**Chapter One: Gigantic**

Charlie Pace and his friends, Patrick Gleason and Julianne Morgan, usually dawdled on their respective ways home, but their footsteps were quite a bit more quick this particular day. Not only was this a Friday, but it was a Friday before a long weekend. These were more exciting.

The trio stepped through the double doors and paused for a moment on the big stone steps to untie ties and untuck shirts. Once outside, Sister Maria couldn't tell them how to wear their uniforms.

"You guys coming over today?" Charlie asked, like he did everyday.

"I can, Mum won't be home until later," Julianne replied, tucking one long red strand of hair behind her ear. Patrick agreed, he could come, and it seemed a normal Friday afternoon.

The three walked to Charlie's house, chattering happily and other such teenage-like stuff.

"Who's car is that?" Julianne asked, ending the conversation abruptly. A strange car was parked, sort of on an angle, in the driveway. Both Patrick and Julianne looked at Charlie, whose eyebrows were furrowed in confusion.

"I don't know. I guess we'll find out, right." Charlie headed up to the door and Patrick and Julianne followed quickly.

"Mum, who's here?" Charlie yelled as soon as he got inside. He dropped his bag and headed to his room to change out of his uniform.

"Baby brother!" Charlie was stunned to hear Liam's voice, but before he had time to be, well, stunned, Liam was right there, arm around Charlie.

"Hey, Liam, what are you doing here?" Charlie pushed away a bit, Liam smelled like he'd been drinking.

"Not happy to see your brother?" Liam slurred, and Charlie was sure he'd been drinking.

"Not when you're drunk. What are you doing here? Where's Mum?"

"Do you still play?" Liam seemed to be avoiding the question of why exactly he was home yet, Liam usually went out on Friday nights.

"What? Of course I do, you know that. Why?" Charlie now was confused. "Is that your car? That's not your car."

"It's not my car. We could be big, Charlie." Liam finally answered one question before finally moving to his original point.

"Liam, I have friends here, can we talk about this later..." Charlie tried again to leave, but Julianne spoke up.

"I know when I'm not wanted, I'll go. See you, Charlie." Julianne let herself out, and Patrick looked back and forth between the door and Liam and Charlie.

"Should I? Perhaps this isn't the best time. I'm going to catch up with Julianne." Patrick, too, let himself out.

"So we can talk now?" Liam asked after a moment of silence.

* * *

"_I think they call this an exposition dump. Anyway, to spare the details, I'll fill you in on what happened. Charlie, Liam, and Patrick started playing together, they called themselves _Gigantic. _Well, they started playing together formally, in clubs and the like. Liam graduated, surprisingly, some would say. The whole time, indeed, since we were thirteen, I'd liked Patrick, but I never got my chance, he started dating Melissa Reid, who'd never spoken a kind word to him until he was in a band. I still see Charlie often, but it's no secret I don't much like Liam. _

_I guess when all is said and done, if you're not in the band, you're an outsider, and I, Julianne Morgan, had been an outsider my whole life. I wish I could say there was a happy ending for me, but there's not. Truthfully, the day I left, the day Liam was drunk and Charlie half-attempted to stick up for me, was the last time things were the same. We never gathered at Charlie's anymore, I rarely saw Patrick alone, and our life wasn't the same much after that."_

_

* * *

_

Julianne felt a little hurt, as Charlie'd not spoken to her since she left his house, and Patrick hadn't spoken much to her either. She tried ringing Patrick a couple times, but his mother told her he was busy, and the one time he'd answered, he spoke about four words and hung up.

At school they acted like nothing was different, Charlie put his arm around her and chatted and Patrick joked around and plotted the demise of a certain Melissa Reid, who this time had "accidently" spilled her tray down his front at lunch.

Thinking all had been forgotten, Julianne ventured to ask, "Are we going to your house today, Charlie?"

Charlie stopped his chatter. "Me and Liam are going to Pat's today, Liam's going to pick us up." Charlie exchanged a look over Julianne's head at Patrick. "You can come though, but we're just going to play."

"You guys haven't played together in, well a long time, why the change?" Julianne was confused. Then she placed it, turned to look Charlie right in the eyes. "It's what Liam said on Friday, wasn't it?"

"Jules-"

"Forget it Charlie, stop acting like I won't understand. What has ever made you think I won't understand" Julianne looked into Charlie's eyes again. Then without another word she walked away.

* * *

"_I was asked many times if me and Julianne were dating. Truth is, she was most like a sister to me. It changed though. She came to a few shows, but it was no secret she didn't like my brother. Not entirely sure why, but I guess I don't see a lot of unlikeable things about Liam after having spent my entire fifteen, almost sixteen, years of life with him. _

_Actually, Julianne liked Pat. Pat either never realized, or didn't share her feelings, but nothing ever happened. I think when Julianne stopped talking to him was when he started dating Melissa Reid, the very person who was the object of Pat's loathing. She practically threw herself at Pat once Gigantic stated playing some Manchester clubs. We weren't even that great, we still did covers and were in desperate need of another guitarist."_

_

* * *

_

"Your girlfriend doesn't like me." Liam complained to Charlie one morning.

"She's not my girlfriend." Charlie hurriedly tucked in his shirt and slipped into his shoes.

"But she still doesn't like me."

"I have to go now. Unlike you, I still have to pass. How'd you manage to graduate anyway?" Charlie slammed the door shut, leaving Liam alone in the kitchen.

Not for long though, Catherine Pace, Liam and Charlie's mother, drifted into the kitchen and put water on to boil for tea. She sat down at the table across from Liam.

"Aren't you going to give Charlie a ride to school?" She inquired, knowing of their current disagreement. A smile spread across her face. Mrs. Pace was very laidback with her sons, so long as they attended Mass each week. Liam would later admit that the reason he married Karen was that she reminded him of his mother.

"Don't worry, he can take care of himself. Put a shirt on." Mrs. Pace patted her son's hands and left, the kettle still on.

"The water's still on!" Liam shouted to his mother.

" I know. Tea's in the cupboard."

Charlie arrived at school before Patrick and Julianne. He concentrated on nothing as he sat outside waiting for either of his friends, hopefully Julianne, as he wasn't really in the mood to deal with Melissa, or Patrick's oblivious obsession with her.

Luckily, it was Julianne who showed up first. Charlie waved her over and she plopped down next to him on the stairs.

"Is Pat here yet?" she asked, watching the crowd.

"Not yet." Charlie also watched the crowd. They sat like that for a few minutes before Julianne turned to Charlie.

"Why do you think he stays with her? She treats him like crap."

"I treated you like crap last year, remember? When we first started the band."

"Yeah, but that's different. No, no it's not. I see your point, sort of. But he could do so much better, you know?" Julianne mused.

"If it makes him happy... I should listen to myself sometimes, shouldn't I?"

"Yeah." Julianne agreed absentmindedly, it was getting late and still no Patrick. Or Melissa, but neither one really cared if she showed up.

The bell rang and Julianne and Charlie went inside, to their respective lessons, Patrick still not there.

* * *

_"I've always been close to my brother, we were each others best friends growing up, despite our age difference. Two years can be a big age gap, but that made no difference to us. When I graduated, I never went anywhere, swearing I'd wait for Charlie, and besides, we've got the band now. The band was going nowhere fast though, no one will sign a band who only covers other songs, except whoever signed Me First and the Gimme Gimmes, but it was still fun. _

_Then I met Sinjin._"

* * *

The band practiced in Patrick's basement, since that's where his drums were and it's easier to move guitars.

Anyway, sometime early 1998, after one of the many practices, Liam made a point.

"We're never going to get anywhere if we don't write our own music." The problem here being, that he made his point when nothing in the current conversation related to this. Probably since there was no particular conversation. Melissa was there, and therefore her and Patrick were otherwise occupied. Charlie was sitting on the floor, leaned up against an amp, writing on his hands with a Sharpie, a habit he'd never been able to shake. Liam had been lost in his thoughts, where his point had come from in the first place.

Charlie looked up, and Patrick looked over. Melissa was still otherwise occupied, not particularily caring about what happened to the band as long as they were, you know, still a band. Patrick pushed her off, his attention on Liam now.

"Think about it. No one wants to listen to a band of teenagers who don't play their own music. The only reason we still play the clubs is because we're loud."

"He's got a point," Charlie observed, going back to writing on his hand.

"I've met a guitarist who just left his band. He's creative. We'll have another guitarist, Charlie can write, we can do it."

Charlie looked up again, and him, Patrick, and Melissa all stared at Liam.

"Can we at least play with Sinjin to see if it's possible?" Liam asked.

"You know, he's really got something going here. We can't play in Manchester clubs our entire lives." Charlie capped his Sharpie and put it in his pocket. "I can put music to some of the writing I've done, and we can do this."

Patrick looked back and forth between Liam and Charlie for a moment. "Sure, why not?"

Melissa smiled widely and kissed Patrick's cheek.

* * *

_"Well, we played with Sinjin, and he was amazing. It was unanimous, we're going for it. Anyway, we played some of Charlie's songs and they loved us. We were more popular than ever, but things weren't so good for us. Melissa disliked Sinjin incredibly, and I decided to break it off. Sure Charlie pressured me into it, but it's for the best, I hope. _

_We needed a new name, we couldn't be Gigantic forever, we needed something our own to go with playing our own music."_

_

* * *

_

TBC


	2. Chapter Two: DriveSHAFT

Disclaimer: The quote and various stuff in the story is taken from Second Tour of Finland, URL: Sher helped me muchos, too, love ya!

"We're just four guys who got this chance to get up on stage. We've never claimed to know anything, to know any answers. We're just asking questions, just like the audience. Basically, we don't know what the fuck is going on either."

_-Liam Pace_

**Chapter Two: DriveSHAFT **

"Ya know, we need a new name," Patrick slurred and leaned against Melissa, who giggled and kissed him.

The scene was after a gig at a club, the band, plus Melissa, who always seems to be wherever Patrick is, in this time, the Pace's basement. Much drinking is occuring.

This is about all any of them remember the next morning, except for two words written on Charlie's hands, with the ever familiar Sharpie.

It is probably not necessary to mention that the words were 'drive' and 'shaft'.

* * *

"_I hadn't been with the band long before I felt like I'd been playing with them for my entire life. I knew them and their roles in the band before long, and it worked wonderfully. Liam, he's out of school, out of work, and guitarist. Charlie's still in school, he's the bassist and genius behind our songs. Patrick's percussionist, same age as Charlie- seventeen- and the one with the groupie girlfriend. _

_We started playing more in Manchester, and it was definitely an eye opener! The people in Manchester loved us! Local musicians, doing their own songs, but our first real gig, you know, where we were the ones with an opening act. We weren't at our best; we hadn't gotten a chance to practice in that club. Charlie's bass was turned up too high, my guitar was turned down, and Liam messed up the chord progression in at least three songs. We were a mess!"_

_

* * *

_

"Julianne! I haven't seen you around." Charlie embraced his friend. She smiled and hugged him back. "You look so different, I like the short hair."

Julianne held Charlie arm's length away. "You look different too, did you dye your hair"

"Yeah, I'm not sure I like it though." Charlie ran a hand through his hair. "So, last year of school, how about that? We made it."

"I missed you. You were so busy this summer." Julianne reached up and ruffled Charlie's hair.

"Yes, well. Would you like to see us practice? Have you met Sinjin yet?"

"I'd love to, don't suppose I can change first?" Julianne gestured at her uniform and laughed.

"Sure, I'll get Liam to swing by your house first, he's picking me up, still no license."

Julianne had somewhat forgotten about the unfortunate side-effect that was Liam. Of course, missing her best friend, she could deal with him, at least, that's what she made herself do.

The two walked towards the parking lot, as soon as they rounded the corner, a car honk, that could only be Liam, alerted them as to where he was parked.

"That's Liam all right." Charlie smiled.

Fifteen minutes or so later, everyone, namely Julianne, sufficiently changed, Liam's car screeched into the drive at Patrick's house. Charlie put his arm around Julianne and the three let themselves in, Patrick's parents weren't home from work yet.

After a quick introduction, Patrick running up to get snacks, surprisingly Melissa-free.

Sinjin commented on this. "Ha, she's mad at him right now. Not sure why though." Charlie replied. "You got a girl yet?"

* * *

_"Charlie inviting me to practice was one of the best things that happened to me. I met Sinjin, the new guitarist. He's really a sweetie, but Charlie doesn't seem to like him much. Of course, it could be me, guys have different ways of showing friendship. I started dating Sinjin soon after meeting him. It was nice, I felt like one of the group again. Charlie didn't like it. I told him I didn't like his current habits regarding sex, and that shut him up quick._

_I'm not an outsider anymore. At least, not for long."_

* * *

Charlie felt empty. Julianne, for the past, what, four years, had always been under his arm, she fit so nicely. Now he had to watch her, pressed up against Sinjin, the kisses, the laughing, they did everything together. They probably... no, he didn't want to think about that. 

He didn't really have to. Sitting backstage after the gig, they were, well, all over each other. All leaned up against each other, drinks in hand, talking quietly, obviously only to each other.

Sinjin ruffled Julianne's hair. Charlie couldn't take it anymore, only he could do that! That was a best-friend reserved thing. At least it was. Julianne didn't seem to mind.

Charlie left his drink on the table and left. He opened the backstage entrance and stepped into the cool night air. It was chilly and he shivered. He hugged himself to keep warm.

He leaned back against the brick wall. He needed something to lean on, he didn't have his best friend for that anymore. Sliding down against the wall, he curled up in the foetal position and hugged himself. He thought he could cry, but that would be too cliche.

He sat there awhile before the door opened. Julianne stepped out and kneeled beside him, hugging her knees, too. "You okay?"

"Yeah, just needed some fresh air." Charlie lied.

"You're lying. I've known you since we were three, you can't lie to me anymore." Julianne sat down next to him and stretched her legs out. She leaned against Charlie's curled up form. "Don't be sad." She whispered.

After a few moments, she stood up and dragging Charlie up, too. "Come back inside. Too much longer out here, someone will notice, and you'll be mobbed by fangirls. And it's cold."

Julianne reached up to open the door and realized the lack of door handle. She swore.

* * *

"_And that is how me and Julianne ended stumbling around drunk in Manchester alleys. I guess I got to spend some time with her, at least. Even though the people that found us were kind of scary and said something about vampires, but you know, we could've died or something. _

_But then, a few months later, Rythym offered us a record deal. I was shocked. I didn't really want to do it, you know, weeks away from finishing school, and the band was getting kind of crazy. Part of me wanted to call it off right then, we've got to do something with our lives. But I realized, this is what I'm doing with my life. It went downhill though. And fast."_

_

* * *

_

"They want us to have the album ready for release in November. That gives us six months. Less, because we have to have it all recorded and ready for promotion... Can we do it? Can anyone?" Sinjin sighed. He, like Patrick and Charlie, were still kind of skeptical over this record thing.

"Really we've got enough already, we don't need any new material. We just have to record it." Liam tried to make it sound doable, and yes, even easy.

"It's not that easy." Patrick voiced what they were all thinking.

"Okay. Fine. Don't think we can do it." Liam folded his arms and locked gazes with Patrick.

"Liam! Okay, maybe we can do it, just stop acting so childish about it." Charlie put in. He was in his usual spot, leaned against an amp, bass across his lap, writing on his hands with the Sharpie. T-I-M-E, the letters spelt, one on each finger.

"Childish? I'm just being optimistic! What the fuck do you know about recording an album?"

Charlie looked up at Liam. "Well what the fuck do you know?"

"Okay! Okay, calm down." Sinjin stepped in. "Here's what we do. Tonight we kick back and celebrate. Then we try our fucking hardest to get the album done. If we don't, we don't. If we do, then we've got an album."

"I can deal with that." Patrick said, a grin on his face. Charlie and Liam both nodded.

"Great. We can pick up the girls, and head to my place. No parents to crash our party." Sinjin smiled.

"Do we need the girls? It's our celebration." Charlie knew if they picked up the girls, Sinjin and Julianne would be all over each other, as usually happened when they were together and drunk. He could most of the time blissfully deny the fact that they slept together, but it's a bit harder when they're practically doing it _right there_ in front of you.

"Charlie's right," Patrick, surprisingly, agreed.

* * *

_"That was a fun night. We could've gone out, Patrick'd had his eighteenth birthday only a few weeks before, and he was the last one to do so. It was the last shred of privacy any of us had for the next three years, so it was welcome. We got so drunk we passed out and followed through on the plan to try for the November release date. _

_We had a meeting the next day, which didn't go so well, due to all of us being quite hungover, but we booked studio time and all was well. Charlie and Patrick graduated, we worked on the album, which was turning out good and we were even ahead of schedule."_

_

* * *

_

Sinjin and Julianne walked together, hand in hand, the sidewalk crowded even though the October air was chilly. A shop's window bore a poster announcing the November 8th release of the DriveSHAFT album. Julianne pointed it out with a smile.

"You did it."

* * *

_The release was a hit. Ha, that's an understatement. We were, finally, doing something with the music and it felt amazing. Melissa loved it as much as we did, I'm sure. Of course, everyone's attitude that she was only with me because of our fame didn't help much. _

_The critics were harsh, and this I think was what we were the least prepared for. Luckily, no one seemed to care what they thought, which was a good thing, in any case. With the stress of the release off, we prepared for a European tour. We'd never been on tour before, hell, we've never played outside of Manchester."_

_

* * *

_

_TBC _


End file.
